I am referring to semestral break.
I am used to comfort when it rains.
As a kid, I associate the rain with hot home-made soup from my mom and a whole day snuggle with my Spiderman pillows with a good mystery novel to make me sane. Where I grew up, a typhoon signal number 2 can mean brown-out. The fascination of playing with melted candle and moths, I enjoyed in front a warm coffee and nice family talks with my parents and siblings. Late cold nights always end with us all covered in blanket with some eery fabricated stories to tell. The aftermath-no classes, the smell of the sun as it hits the drenched leaves, was still perfect.
There goes my fascination for rain, which until now, had grew up with me. But all the things that used to come with it did not.
Now, I try to find contentment in a bowl of instant noodles, or if I'm lucky, some cheap batchoy in the carinderia across the street. I would still cover myself with blanket but Spiderman and mystery novels were long gone and all I can see are books and cases that are left unread. I would call my mom to ask how she is, but would try hard not to initiate one with my dad. Scary stories, I would still tell myself- but they don't take the form of a lady in white or some big guy smoking. There are more things in life that are worth the fear.
When rain finds me, all I can do is to find solitude in putting my hoodie on, walking and eventually reminiscing some memories that would hopefully keep me warm.
mind too tired from studying + waiting for tea to get warm + lack of interesting thing to post
I was originally tagged to give things people may not know about me. But I think I already did that a few years ago in another blog, so scrap. Here's to boredom!
I wish people know that...
1) I cry over chick-flicks and likes watching one when I am sad. I am a "mind" person. but that doesn't mean I lost attachment to the "heart".
2) I am not a text person. I check my phone like a yaya watching telenevola checks her alaga.
3) I get sick easily. I have random(anytime, anywhere) epistaxis attack whenever my body feels imbalanced.
4) I only look snob. Okay, people think I have some swagger, but really, I am nice. My mom actually thinks I am too nice.
5) I am more of a wallflower. Oh, maybe that's the reason for 4.
6) I suck at consoling crying friends. I would often slam the truth in their face, so I always end up keeping quiet, which I am not capable of.
7) I hate people who thinks Michael Cera is Jesse Eisenberg.
8) I go to a bookstore to read, not to flirt. Every time, every fucking time.
9) I don't have the time like I had before.
10) I am not straight.
I wish people don't know that...
1) I am always online, only invisible because it completely destroys the purpose of being invisible.
2) I read a lot. I hate it when people ask me "Hey have you read this book?" and turns out I still haven't. It's even sadder than blowing a virtual birthday cake on iPad.
3) I seldom borrow books. Uneasiness engulfs my whole body every time I lend books. Because lending books means updating my book inventory and making sure the pages are still complete and in good condition.
3) I don't get drunk easily. I miss playing drunk and acting wasted just to bull some people off.
4) I give rationale advice because it gets annoying when people don't listen and tell me I am too cynic and realistic but would call in the middle of the night to tell me I am right.
5) I make exam reviewers that I share with my friends. I am crab at some point but it gets annoying when law school gets too high school-ly. But yeah, it's sorta high school.
6) I am adept in Photoshop and arts. Back in college, free service when abused is not fun.
7) I love movies. Same reason as 2 and 3.
8) my ultimate dream is to work in an ad agency. I still find it hard to explain when people ask I am I in law school.
9) I live in an area accessible to almost everywhere. "Hey I am in katip, inuman"- ok. "Eastwood, movie"-ok. "Coffee, kahit saan"-ok.
10) I usually over-think.
grab some coffee and last minute cram in technohub + exam later + school forever
I am always caught in this situation. As much as I hate it, I often see myself in the middle of every family misunderstandings.
Every fucking time, there has to be this one person to stand in between clashing stones. That one person that will always take the blame no matter what just to smoothen things up. These people don't even understand the pressure and stress they have been placing in my back ever since I took up their fucking dreams.
Please just kill me.